It was a dark and stormy night.
Mr Kotick stared out the window, the weather reflected his tumultuous mood. He
knew he had no choice, the investor's hunger and lust for money had to be
sated. Black ops 2 had to be released. He wept silently, what other choice did
he have? He had no other option than to unleash this turd onto the unsuspecting
public.
It had all started twenty years
ago, when Bobby was just a young aspiring junior CEO working for Activision. It
had been a bright and beautiful day, the sun had been shining and the sky had
only been blemished by a few fluffy bunny like clouds that hopped through the
sky, like giant white march hares made of water vapour. Bobby had only been
there a week and had yet to fully learn the layout of his new workplace and as
such the inevitable had happened, he had become lost among the winding
corridor's of Activision headquarters. He remembered it being humid and very
dark, it had felt totally disconnected from the fine day it was outside.
After what had seemed like hours
of aimlessly wondering trying to find his desk in the dank stony hallways he
had come across a sinister looking oak door. Despite a sense of incredible
foreboding that filled him when he looked at the door he decided to investigate
it.
He had gently pushed back the
door, though it had appeared to be constructed from a heavy oak it was as light
as a feather and easily swung back at his light girlish touch. A baleful red
glow emanated forth from the opened aperture there was no longer any turning
back Bobby stepped through the portal, slowly, carefully and was confronted
with a sight too horrible to imagine.
The room he had entered was gargantuan, he could not
see the ceiling nor the walls, it was as though he had stepped outside, at
least in regards to the openness; the atmosphere however resembled the outdoors
as much as the bottom of a well. The sky was blood red and the ground was a
garish purple, with surface of like that of jagged rocks. But before the young Activison employee could
absorb any more of his surroundings a malevolent voice rang out.
"Come in my dear Robert! You're just in
time!" Cackled the Johannes Tagliatelli, majority stock holder of
Activision. Before the junior CEO all the shareholders had congregated, they
were stood in a loose semicircle, with Bobby roughly in the middle. Suddenly he
noticed something horrible, before him lay the naked form of a young girl,
blood had been splattered in the area. her rib cage rent asunder, something
truly horrible was happening here.
"It is terrible is it
not?" Said Mr Tagliatelli, his tall slender form stood behind Robert, a
toothy grin had begun to creep across his face. "Truly shameful, we have
no choice but to do this to remain in your world and though her soul was truly
delicious she cannot sustain us for long." He leant down to Bobby's level,
laying his gangling skeletal hands on the young CEO's shoulders. Bobby could
now see the jagged blood caked teeth, he smelled the stench of decay on the
stockholder's breath. "That is why we recruited you, my dear Robert! Our
most precious Robert! Only you have the talent to secure our continued
existence, you and you alone. We must have souls and you alone have the means to
ensnare them for us." The young Robert was shaking "Why me?" he
thought on the verge of tears though he was already weeping inwardly,
"Better that you don't know my dear Robert" the monstrous form of
Tagliatelli said, raising himself up to his full height. "That way we can
be sure you will not attempt to subvert our plans. Though rest assured, we do
not take subversion lightly."
It was all too much for the poor
man, Mr Kotick was only mortal after all, he surmised that he had blacked out
at that point. He had found himself awake at his desk and life had gone on as
normal. In time he had almost forgotten the dreadful incident in the bowels of
the Activision HQ, attributing it to a rotten falukorv he had eaten the night
before, Swedish food was like Swedish music. Absolutely vile and disgusting.
But now he knew as he started
gloomily out onto the rain soaked patio, he knew that it had been all too real.
Though now he was too late, it was the eve of the black ops 2 launch, nothing
could be done to stop it, so many poor innocent souls were doomed.
Peter Larsson sat brooding in
the Gothenburg-Landvetter Airport, it was time to take action. For as long as
he could remember his life had been enthralled by the popular video game series
"Call of Duty". It had consumed his very soul, for too long had he
sat in his mother's underground sex dungeon, having his essence utterly violated
by the modern fps. It had alienated him from his family, all his friends and it
had ruined his promising career as a Perverted Justice operative. Now he spent
his days as a salesman, selling alcohol to minors in an attempt to fuel his
addiction.
It was time for the salesman,
time to end it all once and for all. Before he went down however he would eliminate
the source of his ruination, the mastermind behind the Call of Duty franchise.
His gate opened, his moment had arrived. Robert Kotick had to die.
Mr Kotick flinched at the sound
of someone beating heavily on his door, thunder cracked as he went to greet his
unexpected guest. Perhaps they could help him forget about the evil he was
about to unleash. He unlocked the door and on opening it he was confronted with
an absolute wreck of a man. A pale slab of flesh with bloodshot jaundiced eyes.
Mr Kotick knew immediately that this poor man's condition had been caused by
Robert himself, by the hit video game series "Call of Duty".
"W-why
d-do you do this to us Mr Kotick?" stammered the wretched man in a
unsettling sounding southern drawl, "I w-won't let you d-do this to anyone
e-else!" he said as he laboriously brought a pistol to bear at the haggard
CEO. Robert lowered his gaze, he knew he deserved it but at that moment, on
seeing the strength this young derelict had mustered an idea had occurred to
him. Perhaps all was not lost after all.
"I probably deserve
it" Said the CEO grimly, "but hear me out first, I never intended for
this to happen." Suddenly he stared at the slightly overweight Swede
straight in the eyes. "I can still make this right, even at this late hour.
I just need your help". It was enough for the impressionable young
salesman, though he had come fully intending to kill the man before him he had
not expected such remorse from him. He believed him and he still wanted to make
things right. He lowered his gun.
Within an hour they were racing
down the road toward Activision headquarters, though the wild wind and the
pouring rain they raced forth, the fate of the world in the balance.
Robert rushed to explain the
events that took place twenty years ago while they attempted to lose themselves
among the labyrinth, to find that dark forbidden place that evil called home
within the depths of Activison headquarters.
After an hour of frenzied
searching they found it, it was no less forboding now than it had been all
those years ago. Silently, with one purpose in mind they pushed back the door.
What confronted them was a most
macabre sight, the entire board of investors naked, floating gently around in
the air tethered to a glowing pair of blue balls that lay directly in front of
them. Robert spotted Johannes Tagliatelle among the crowd, a serene look on his
sharp face.
"Those balls must be what
siphons the souls to them." Said Peter, now an expert in the occult and
American politics after Mr Kotick's lengthy speech. "Give me your gun"
said the determined CEO, "I started all this, this is all my fault I
should be the one to finish it."
He took peters gun and he shot
the investors square in the blue eldritch balls. Immediately they saw the
effect, the pale face of Johannes Tagliatelle contorted painfully before he
disolved into ash along with the other stockholders. It was finally over.
"We can rest now Peter" said Bobby collapsing to his knees, "We
did it."
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